Volkov is stupid, he doesn't know how to play RWL

[Blood Wake]

Sean = Blood Wake (me)

Gen. Volkov = Retard

convo on MSN:



Gen. Volkov says:
I demand reparations for the rats you have destroyed!
Gen. Volkov says:
LOL
Sean says:
hmm.... Nah
Sean says:
you killed tons of mine too
Gen. Volkov says:
Then face the terrible wrath of my cows!
Gen. Volkov says:
Did not
Gen. Volkov says:
I have never once killed your rats
Sean says:
yeah, well I don't even know who you are in turbo
Sean says:
lol
Gen. Volkov says:
LOL
Gen. Volkov says:
The HOunds of Ulster (#13)
Gen. Volkov says:
DUH
Sean says:
thats right
Gen. Volkov says:
lol
Sean says:
stop killing my rats
Sean says:
lol
Gen. Volkov says:
I have never killed your rats except in self defense
Gen. Volkov says:
Stoats on the other hand...
Sean says:
well then stop killing my rats in self defense
Gen. Volkov says:
I can't help it
Sean says:
pshh, I have too many stoats, I don't care if you kill them
Gen. Volkov says:
You keep attacking me
Gen. Volkov says:
lol
Gen. Volkov says:
Goody
Gen. Volkov says:
And you've killed my stoats too
Gen. Volkov says:
Whenever I attack you, my precious stoats die
Sean says:
your stoats deserve it
Gen. Volkov says:
lol
Sean says:
I caught one trying to steal my rum
Gen. Volkov says:
Don't use that "You have 7 million, what's a thousand or two?" logic either
Gen. Volkov says:
lol
Gen. Volkov says:
Well it's only fair
Gen. Volkov says:
You have rum, I do not
Sean says:
yeah, because I bought it
Gen. Volkov says:
And my leaders are non-existent, so I have to uses the stoatses
Sean says:
I killed your leaders
Gen. Volkov says:
There are no leaders on turbo
Sean says:
there were, I killed them
Gen. Volkov says:
*Taps your skull* Hallooooo anyone in there?
Gen. Volkov says:
lol
Gen. Volkov says:
Snare did actually
Sean says:
Peace Alliance has more loyalty then you so obviously he had leaders at some point in time
Sean says:
I killed them though
Gen. Volkov says:
How much does he have?
Sean says:
600
Gen. Volkov says:
Well that's odd
Sean says:
no its not... I was attacking him so I sent him 100 loyalty to make up for it
Gen. Volkov says:
LOL
Gen. Volkov says:
ROFL
Gen. Volkov says:
LMAO
Gen. Volkov says:
OMG, you sent him 100 completely worthless loyalty to make up for taking very valuable land and killing his precious troops
Gen. Volkov says:
I love it
Sean says:
well... yeah
Sean says:
I figured he'd like some
Gen. Volkov says:
I'm doing that next time I hit someone
Gen. Volkov says:
lol
Sean says:
hes gonna be mentioned for it at the end of the round too
Sean says:
Nope!
Gen. Volkov says:
LOL
Sean says:
I patented it
Gen. Volkov says:
The whole idea?
Sean says:
err... I have a patent on it or something
Sean says:
yes
Gen. Volkov says:
lol
Sean says:
the whole idea
Gen. Volkov says:
Can't be done
Sean says:
it is mine and no one else can use it
Sean says:
yes it can
Gen. Volkov says:
Only the action can be patented
Gen. Volkov says:
Ideas cannot
Sean says:
shut up and stop killing my rats
Gen. Volkov says:
LOL
Gen. Volkov says:
You shut up and stop killing my rats
Gen. Volkov says:
lol
Sean says:
your the one killing my rats though
Gen. Volkov says:
You killed more of mine than I killed of yours
Sean says:
nope!
Sean says:
not true
Sean says:
I have never once killed your rats
Sean says:
you are always killing mine though
Gen. Volkov says:
I knows what I knows, and don't bother me with the facts
Gen. Volkov says:
Or lies in this case
Gen. Volkov says:
LIES!
Gen. Volkov says:
LIES!
Sean says:
you log on and you say "hey! why don't I go kill Blood Wake's rats, he doesn't need them"
Gen. Volkov says:
LIES I say!
Gen. Volkov says:
All LIES!
Gen. Volkov says:
Get thee behind master of lies!
Gen. Volkov says:
me*
Sean says:
then you go ahead and attack me with a guerrila thingy when I don't even have any land just to kill off all my rats
Sean says:
your so rude
Gen. Volkov says:
Get thee behind me*
Gen. Volkov says:
Ahem
Gen. Volkov says:
I did nothing of the sort!
Sean says:
yeah, well my skiffs told me
Gen. Volkov says:
You always have land!
Sean says:
I don't know if skiffs talk
Sean says:
but they told me
Gen. Volkov says:
LOL
Gen. Volkov says:
They can't cause they are BOATS
Sean says:
they have rats that drive them
Gen. Volkov says:
Do not
Gen. Volkov says:
They are all on their own
Sean says:
cause they are obviously not remote controlled and yet they always seem to do stuff like send people stuff and attack people
Gen. Volkov says:
And you don't drive a boat, you pilot it
Gen. Volkov says:
lol
Sean says:
and they race
Gen. Volkov says:
But rats don't drive them
Gen. Volkov says:
Otters do
Sean says:
nope, rats do
Gen. Volkov says:
OTTERS
Sean says:
what else are going to?
Gen. Volkov says:
OTTERS
Sean says:
otters?! screw them, they don't need boats, they're faster than the boats
Gen. Volkov says:
Not if the boat is in a storm
Gen. Volkov says:
Or has a propellor
Sean says:
otters are still faster
Gen. Volkov says:
No, top speed of an otter in water is about 15 miles per hour
Sean says:
not redwall otters
Sean says:
redwall otters go as fast as they want
Sean says:
cause I said so
Gen. Volkov says:
Redwall otters don't swim
Sean says:
so did retto, hes an otter
Gen. Volkov says:
They drive boats
Sean says:
nope, they swim
Gen. Volkov says:
Pilot boats
Gen. Volkov says:
Do not
Gen. Volkov says:
They are wimpy and don't go in the waer
Sean says:
yes they do
Gen. Volkov says:
Because they are all anthropomorphic
Sean says:
I have an otter, he tells me these things
Gen. Volkov says:
Well I have a beaver who says that otters lie alot
Sean says:
beavers are retarded
Gen. Volkov says:
Are nopt
Gen. Volkov says:
They build dams
Sean says:
they are always out to get the otters by building dams so the otters have to stop going 641 miles per hour and walk around it
Gen. Volkov says:
They are geniuses
Gen. Volkov says:
LOL
Gen. Volkov says:
641 mph is nearly the speed of sound
Sean says:
so?
Gen. Volkov says:
The otters would become an otter paste at that speed
Sean says:
I said that otters go as fast as they want
Sean says:
nope!
Gen. Volkov says:
I don't care what kind of otter he is
Gen. Volkov says:
641 mph in water would kill anything and anyone who tried it
Sean says:
nope! cause otters do it all the time
Sean says:
the otter I have in turbo says hes gone 4724
Gen. Volkov says:
That otter is lying
Sean says:
I didn't believe him either so I put him on my lie detector thing
Gen. Volkov says:
lol
Sean says:
he was telling the truth
Sean says:
either that or my lie detector doesn't work anymore
Gen. Volkov says:
He was just a very good liar
Gen. Volkov says:
Or he fooled it, which it is possible to do
Gen. Volkov says:
that's many times the speed of sound, he'd be little otter particles suspended in water
Sean says:
no, I don't think my lie detector has ever worked
Gen. Volkov says:
LOL
Sean says:
I strapped a leader up to it before in reg and he said that Peace alliance had only 5 stoats so I attacked Peace and didn't break him when I had about 4 million
Gen. Volkov says:
LOL
Sean says:
yeah... that leader is still down in the torture chaimber
Gen. Volkov says:
Yup, that's one broken lie detector
Gen. Volkov says:
LOL
Gen. Volkov says:
Only way to get the truth
Sean says:
yup
Gen. Volkov says:
lol
Sean says:
he finally admited that he was actually one of Peace's leaders and that peace had stolen the leader I sent over there to spy on him
Gen. Volkov says:
LOL
Sean says:
so I sent out a group of otters to go get him, they came back with him before I was even done talking cause they're so freaking fast
Gen. Volkov says:
ROFL
Gen. Volkov says:
Right
Gen. Volkov says:
Anyway
Gen. Volkov says:
I gtg
Gen. Volkov says:
Stupid class
Sean says:
your mean
Sean says:
stop killing my rats
Gen. Volkov says:
LOL
Gen. Volkov says:
YOu stop killing my rats!
Sean says:
I didn't
Gen. Volkov says:
Liar!
Sean says:
nope!
Gen. Volkov says:
*Hooks you up to a lie detector, needles swing wildly*
Gen. Volkov says:
See?
Sean says:
that lie detector is broken
Gen. Volkov says:
Blood Wake (#11) attacked you! Your enemy captured 450 Acres of Land and destroyed:
55,601 Rats
You managed to destroy:
45,469 Rats
Gen. Volkov says:
Proof!
Gen. Volkov says:
HAH!
Gen. Volkov says:
You kilt my rats!
Sean says:
here use mine *pulls out a little rat*

rat: Blood Wake tells the truth
Gen. Volkov says:
LOL
Sean says:
yeah, but look how many of my rats you killed
Gen. Volkov says:
Less then you killed of mine
Sean says:
nope
Sean says:
you lie
Gen. Volkov says:
55 is bigger than 45
Sean says:
Blood Wake (#11) attacked you! Your enemy captured 450 Acres of Land and destroyed:
2 Rats
You managed to destroy:
45,469 Rats
Gen. Volkov says:
LOL
Gen. Volkov says:
Blood Wake (#11) attacked you! Your enemy captured 450 Acres of Land and destroyed:
55,601 Rats
You managed to destroy:
45,469 Rats
Gen. Volkov says:
Liar
Sean says:
please stop giving me false data
Rat says: yeah, ya jerk
Gen. Volkov says:
LOL
Gen. Volkov says:
Shut up
Gen. Volkov says:
I gtg to class
Sean says:
I don't care as long as you stop killing my rats
Gen. Volkov says:
*Kills your little rat*
Gen. Volkov says:
Screw off*
Gen. Volkov says:
lol
Sean says:
*slams fist down* this means WAR!!!
Gen. Volkov says:
*Cuts your fist off*
Gen. Volkov says:
HAH
Sean says:
*runs around screaming, hits a wall*
Gen. Volkov says:
*Laughs his head off*
Gen. Volkov says:
*Literally*
Sean says:
I'm blocking you

Convo a second later on AIM:

Crazy Soviet [3:02 P.M.]:  wat?
Crazy Soviet [3:02 P.M.]:  I thought we were joking around
Theratboyz [3:02 P.M.]:  shut up!!!! I BLOCKED YOU!!!!

Here is proof that I have an otter and that Volkov is always killing my rats:

[Neobaron]

Wow.

He killed one hundred million rats, and only lost one.

[Gen. Volkov]

ROFLMAO. Nice Wake.

Yes, because I am l33t like that Neo. :ninja:

And Blood Wake = IQ 12

Gen. Volkov = l33t hax0r.

[Aqualis]

ROFL

[cloud]

I feel bad for anyone who read that whole post...

... cuz i didnt, lol.

[Aqualis]

I did.

[Neobaron]

As did I.

[Blood Wake]

it is smaller than it appears, kind of like that mirror thing

[Gen. Volkov]

Yah, and the more you read, the funnier it is.

[Naltaca]

Dear lord... Out of all the convos between 5 year olds I've ever read, I would have to say that one is by far the funniest.

[Gen. Volkov]

We're not five! My mental age is 6 and a haf thank you! And Blood Wake's is somewhere between 3 and insane.