my fingers hurt

[Peace Alliance]

 hi, my name is spike. If you haven't considered gold as your #1 pain releaver, i suggest you try it today. Got jsut $99 per pound, you can do wonders to your body. It relieves pain, itch and pody growth! if you want to look like your 18 for the rest of your life, my suggestion is gold. Gold was poineered in the early years before time. throughout its history, the product has been refined and improved to bring you the quility product it is today. Gold reached its peak in intrust when the gold rush hit alaska. There, people set out to find as much of it as they could. Not for a low low price of only $99, you too can experience the wonders it did for them.

[Holby]

 As a satisfied customer of Gold, I strongly advise purchasing it. Gold made me feel young again! I was feeling and looking so dreadfully old when I was 3. Then, I bought Gold from Spike, and I felt days younger! LOOKED days younger!
At $99, plus only $34 for postage and handling, this is an unmissable opportunity! Look at all those rugged looking miners! Discover the joy of gold, and you can look exactly like THEM!

[Peace Alliance]

 If your not convinced yet, check out some MORE information about our product!

Owning gold and gold bullion coins can benefit you as an investor in a number of ways. Gold bullion is a long-term store of value, a highly-liquid, internationally recognized asset of last resort. It can diversify and stabilize your portfolio and protect it against stock market fluctuations.

Most importantly, when you buy the right gold bullion coins, your gold can be completely private gold, non-reportable and not subject to confiscation.

?Is now the right time to buy gold bullion?? With gold, the answer is always the same: "The right time to buy gold is when you understand what gold is and what it can do for your portfolio." This presentation details why you need gold and what gold can do for your portfolio.

? Gold is a long-term storehouse of value. Historically, gold acts as a reliable ?store of value? because it fulfills all the functions of money.

? Gold bullion is portable and divisible, gold is easy to store in an emergency and far more reliable than paper money in a crisis..

? Gold is indestructible, relatively scarce, and cannot be ?manufactured.? Gold's value cannot be inflated away like paper currency.

? Gold bullion coins are highly liquid. Gold is recognizable and acceptable as a form of payment which makes it easy to buy, sell or trade worldwide.

? Gold Keeps Up With Inflation. In recent years, gold prices have traded down because inflation was low. Historically, gold's best friend has been inflation. Economic cycles are permanent facts of life and one of the best reasons to acquire gold today.  Even though gold prices fluctuate over the long term, gold has maintained its long-term value.

In contrast, most commodities amd the U.S. dollar have declined in value due to inflation. This is why gold bullion is often purchased as a hedge against inflation and currency fluctuations. And why so many investors around the world see gold as "the ultimate asset? ? an important and secure part of their investment portfolio.

Gold has kept up with inflation during the past 200 years. In other words, the value of gold ? what it can buy in real goods and services ? has remained remarkably stable over time.

For example, a man?s suit in sixteenth century England at the time of King Henry VIII cost the equivalent of one ounce of gold, roughly the same as a suit would cost today.

Gold, the Hard Asset Diversifier
 Whether your investment approach is conservative or aggressive, gold bullion can play a vital role in diversifying your portfolio. Many experts urge investors to keep a portion of their total assets in gold. Many recommend a holding of 5% of 10% in gold and hard assets.

Gold?s low-to-negative correlation with stocks and bonds makes it an excellent portfolio diversifier.

Gold bullion is one of the best insurance policies for your portfolio. The purpose of diversification into gold is to protect the total portfolio against fluctuations in the value of any one asset or type of asset. Gold does exactly that. The reason is basic: the economic forces that determine the price of gold are different from and in many cases opposed to, the forces that determine the prices of financial assets.

As a result, gold prices move up independently of stocks and bonds- often rising when stock prices fall, and vice versa. Simply put, gold can be viewed as portfolio insurance to guard against unforeseen stock market gyrations or a major high-tech stock market crash.

It's Easy to Buy, Sell, and Trade Gold  
People hold gold for safety, security, and privacy.  When you buy the right gold, it's easy to buy, sell, store and transport in a crisis.

Gold bullion can be purchased in many forms including modern gold bullion coins and bars. You can make purchases in virtually any amount, ranging from a fraction of an ounce upward. The weight and purity of gold coins are precisely controlled and standardized by internationally-recognized refiners and official government mints, allowing you to buy with confidence and sellwith ease.

[Holby]

 Hello. This is Gold talking. I am a good investment and I come framed for an extra $15. I also come bottled. However, the bottom line is "I am good." So buy me.

[Peace Alliance]

 See, even GOLD knows how cool gold is, and who better?
And thats why gold is good, Also, you can upgrade your gold order to Gold GOLD. this offer provides a whopping 20 pounds of gold for ONLY $2480, thats a $500 difference!

Gold has been treasured since ancient times for its beauty and permanence.   Most of the gold that is fabricated today goes into the manufacture of jewelry.   However, because of its superior electrical conductivity and resistance to corrosion and other desirable combinations of physical and chemical properties, gold also emerged in the late 20th century as an essential industrial metal.  Gold performs critical functions in computers, communications equipment, spacecraft, jet aircraft engines, and a host of other products.  Although gold is important to industry and the arts, it also retains a unique status among all commodities as a long-term store of value.  Until recent times, it was considered essentially a monetary metal, and most of the bullion produced each year went into the vaults of government treasuries or central banks.

[Peace Alliance]

 USGS Gold Commodity Specialist
Earle B. Amey, III
Phone: 703-648-4969
Fax: 703-648-7757
Email: eamey@usgs.gov

Thats one guy you might want to contact for MORE information on gold!!

[Peace Alliance]

 Heres a rare picture of gold, in case you were uncertain about our product.

[Peace Alliance]

 Cell Dimensions:  a = 4.0786, Z = 4; V = 67.85 Den(Calc)= 19.28

Properties of Gold  
Cleavage:  None  
Color:  Yellow, Pale yellow, Orange, Yellow white, Reddish white.  
Density:  16 - 19.3, Average = 17.64  
Diaphaniety:  Opaque  
Fracture:  Hackly - Jagged, torn surfaces, (e.g. fractured metals).  
Habits:  Arborescent - "Tree like" growths of branched systems (e.g. silver)., Platy - Sheet forms (e.g. micas)., Granular - Generally occurs as anhedral to subhedral crystals in matrix.  
Hardness:  2.5-3 - Finger Nail-Calcite  
Luminescence:  None.  
Luster:  Metallic  
Magnetism:  Nonmagnetic  
Streak:  yellow  

[Holby]

 Gold has truly splendirefous sentimental value. It sparkles and is shiny.
It is also wonderful to start a craze with. And who can say to me what they honestly haven't been caught up with cheese, or Tamagotchis, or Pokemon, or Holby!
Gold makes people go crazy. Craze and crazy. See the similarity? That is, because, in fact, the longest ever craze was Gold. And you know what? It STILL is gold.
Now you all know why we have crazes, become part of one. BUY GOLD TODAY!
Plus, if you ring this toll-free (but not gold-free) number, you receive a Collector Edition's Gold Gold! It has a whole new crack on its right hand side!
1800 LOTSA GOLD
Come on, what are you waiting for?

[Peace Alliance]

 If you are wondering about more places you can go to get some of our product, then you deserve to fall in an endless pit of death. Because the only place you should get gold is from us, otherwise it doesn't have out one of a kind patented protective layer. Not to mention, its not as cool if Holby or Peace Alliance hasn't indorsed it themselves.

Besides, if you as Gold who Gold likes best, they will tell you its us 'cause we're the best.

Plus, we only feed our gold with all-natural products, not only to ensure your safety, but to ensure that no animals will be hurt in the making of your product!

[Holby]

 We also get only barely used toothbrushes to scrub away any grime or moss from our products! How hygienic, how environment friendly?
As an added bonus just for RWL, you can purchase our Scrub-Gold! A melted down liquid Gold, that comes with a lovely spray bottle to apply it with. Guaranteed to goldify and cleanify!
I use it in my bath and toilet, I do. And how much would you love people to say "ooh, he's made of gold!" About YOU?
Wonderful Gold!

[Scarwake]

 What the heck are jelly crystals????

*stares at holby*

[Peace Alliance]

 just buy some gold ok? its not that hard a concept!

[RazorClaw]

 I think I'll buy 30,000 pounds of gold. I can also trade it with aluminum foil sprayed gold! Much easier to carry.

[Nohcnonk]

 *eats some Gold*  Where are the directions for this stuff?!?  Doesn't say the dosage amount either...