War on Spa Federation

[Krowdon]

For nearly as long as I have been here, Redwall Spamlords has been an essential part of Spa. We had hundreds of posts per day, and people were on for hours at a time Spamming. So what went wrong?

I have two theories. Government in Spa, and MSN. I will first address MSN. Spa used to be a tool of communication. I'm sure everyone had fun spamming, and we all talked to each other. It not a serious issue, but posts in Spa last forever. That funny comment Briar made on MSN, Poof! Gone when you leave the chat. Posts in Spa last forever. That funny comment Briar made? It'll still be there in three years.

The other issue is government. In the beginning, Redwall Spamlords was a group of spammers who gave themselves a title for what they did. This group consisted of Night Wolf, Briar, Ungatt Trunn II, Krowdon, Daryn and Mr. Grimm. They had no ranks. Only the title of Spamlord. Over time, they developed into a government, with armies and leaders. They fought against Firetooth and Pippin, who thought an organization about spam was wrong. But Redwall Spamlords never gave up, and Firetooth and Pippin don't bother us much anymore.

Trying to organize chaos didn't work for us. We gave Night Wolf the power of Chairman, we made laws for spam. Spam is not supposed to have laws or a leader.

As Chairwoman of RSL, I propose that Redwall Spamlords get rid of all ranks and titles, and go back to what it was. A title for  a spammer who earns it. Its like being in an exclusive club. The other members have to vote you in before you can wear that club badge.

I also declare a war on Spa Federation. I want it gone. We shouldn't rule over other peoples spam. How a person spams is part of their personality. No one should try and change that. And we should not try to create a government where a few spammers have power. As a Redwall Spamlord, I seek to return spa to the chaotic center of social interaction it used to be. Down with Spa Federation!

--- Krowdon

[Ungatt Trunn II]

The Federation will not take kindly to the riots in the streets that it protects. We shall guard the civilians at all costs. Your methods of bloodthirsty war to achieve your goals show that you are not meant to be the ruling body. The Federation met today and unanimously voted to meet this threat with our full power. Those who turn against the ideas of spam that we have presented with courtesy shall be given a traitor's death. However, those who stand by us in the times of war will be remembered by citizens in the Federation for years to come. Any who sign up will be granted citizenship. It's total war now. Are you doing your part?

It's a good day to die!

[Krowdon]

Sometimes we fight for what is dear to us. You were there when we fought Pippin and Firetooth to keep control of Spa. War was needed then, and we need it now. I, as a Redwall Spamlord, am ready to fight to the death to rid Spa of your Federation.

[Ungatt Trunn II]

In my eyes you are nothing but a bunch of civilians of the Federation who are spoiled, and have delusions. But we won't go easy on you just because of that. Nor because of our previous friendships. You are a threat to spa, what I am to protect, and must be eradicated by all means necessary.

[Krowdon]

Very well. I will dig up my 'Ungatt Trunn II hate box' and we shall no longer be friends. How shall this war go? Posts?

[Ungatt Trunn II]

Oh no what a crazy thought. No I thought we'd meet at noon and have a showdown in front of the saloon. YES POSTS! AND TOPICS! Which makes this war easy for me, I can simply delete everything I don't like!

Making this an easy victory for me. Would you like to go ahead and surrender?

[Krowdon]

Ha. Surrender to you? I'd commit Seppuku before I did that. I will fight this out with you. Mod powers and all.

Although you should leave posts in this topic alone.

[Ungatt Trunn II]

I could in theory make you perform septicsu tank whatever by editing your posts, so your wish may be granted. Immediately followed by your unconditional surrender.

Face it, the only way you and your rebels pose any threat is your numbers. Which is negligible due to most of you never being on at the same time, and only on in sporadic moments of activity, then gone for god knows how long.

But hey, the war economy can only help the Federation.

[Krowdon]

I will be sending message s to all Spamlords I feel are Loyal.

[Ungatt Trunn II]

Only would be tyrants like you work in the dark like this. And you wonder why (insert global issue here) happens?

[Krowdon]

Please. Me? a Tyrant? I couldnt be one if I wanted to.

[Ungatt Trunn II]

Let your actions decide that.

[Mr.Grimm]

While I dislike that fact that I will have no rank... RSL FOREVER! KROWDON, YOU HAVE MY SWORD!

[Krowdon]

Alright then. I want to say good luck, but I wont. I dont wish that for you. Sorry.

While I dislike that fact that I will have no rank... RSL FOREVER! KROWDON, YOU HAVE MY SWORD!

Thank you Grimm! We fight for how Spa should be! And when we win, I will award medals for your bravery.

[Ungatt Trunn II]

Nothing but bottle caps with confetti taped to the bottom!