Peace Making

[Peace Alliance]

(please note this is going somewhere, follow my long intro to get to the carrot i'm hanging at the end)

Picture a street corner. Two people meet each other for the first time and begin to interact. One man says to the other "I don't really think it's normal to wear a wig." The other man, a wig wearer, replies angrily "I am a wig wearer, and i have a darn good reason to wear one too!" The first man responds with even more anger "Your wig offends us all, why are you ashamed of your shiney head? Stop being such a wimp you butthead!"...

...

You can see how this is escalating. Soon the gloves (and wigs) are off and the two men are duking it out like madmen.

This doesn't often happen does it? People know about limits. When you are having a face to face conversation you cannot blatantly insult the other person. You have to make concessions, you have to show empathy, you have to think like the other person. So why is this not so over the internet? In real life we are more aware of the other person, we know what they look like, we can visually see their reaction, naturally we don't want to start a fight because it would be awkward, painful, counterproductive and - often - illegal.

On the internet we don't have such boundaries. We are distanced by anonymity. There is no need for empathy because the other person is just words and an avatar. They are a collection of ideas, and if those idea's clash with yours in any way, you should feel unconfined to let loose. You can tear those ideas asunder because they are not embodied by a person.

I have recently become a pacifist. One of the most counter-cultural challenges I have ever taken on. There is something so uncomfortable about it. Some may think it's for people who are weak or without courage. But I came to it another way. Fighting is comforting. Revenge is comforting. There is nothing more satisfying then watching the bad guy get what he supposedly deserves. I have all those feelings! Human justice is a euphoric rush, it is satisfying. So is personal safety. I would never want any harm to come to my family. I watched John Adams on HBO, and I too wanted him to fight for freedom! Nothing would have been more dissatisfying then if the Americans had failed in their independence and submitted to Brittish tyranny any longer (something I believed before I watched the HBO series, I'll add). But soon after it gained it's independence, America made peace with the Brittish. They sustained that peace during the wars between France and England. This was an important step. The peace making here is what I am passionate about. Now lets go back to talking about the internet.

Today I had a wonderful example of peace making. I will tell you it was not easy, my instinctual response was to mock, tease and laugh at the person in conflict with me. He was being silly, but my response was carefully made. Instead of yet another fight, the internet saw peace making today!

I commented on this art piece: http://blinck.deviantart.com/art/There-s-no-place-like-home-162057908

My comment (which he hid, i think) went something like this:

"I'm not going to comment on the perspective errors in the water or the reflections of the ghosties because you said there are "intentional imperfections" in this picture. However, was in your friends "perfect place" is he ACTUALLY peeing into the ocean, as it appears?"

(basically, I was pointing out the hilarious fact that the guy in the picture is peeing into the ocean [i worded it better but i forget])

He then responded to me privately:

Blinck said the following:

If you cannot be constructive in a comment, and are just going to simply mock the image, please don't go through the trouble of doing it. Save yourself some time and do something else, something actually productive.
Thank you

As I said, I was ready to fire back... Instead I thought it through and said this:

stickersticker said the following:

You should not feel insulted, Blinck. You put your art up on the internet for interpretation. My comment was not an attempt to insult you, though it was comedy, I simply stated what it was I saw in the picture.

You are being snide when you imply that I was wasting my time. I am a busy guy, but I have your image as my wallpaper at the moment and such frequent exposure lead me to my interpretation. To say that my comment was unproductive is also incorrect. Life would be a bleak, miserable affair if we weren't able to find humor in things. Perhaps that is what your life is like? Perhaps you need to change your outlook? take a breather before you get upset about something so small. And trust me: this was small. Some lil comment made by a humble Canadian half way across the world from you.

I'm saddened by your response to my comment, I had hoped we could share a chuckle. Keep up the good work, I look forward to your future submissions.

I was hopeful that he would receive this well and to my joy he did! The conversation ended like so:

Hey,

After reading this and thinking for a while... you are right. Sometimes I do take little things a bit to serious and personal (specially regarding my art), and don't take the time to think from other prespectives and get defensive right away.
I would like to apologize for my note, and to thank you for helping me see things in another way.
By the way, how epic would it be to take a leak during sunset, while watching flying medusas crossing the sea in the direction of some distant planets ?

I'm sorry once again, and thank you.

Take care

Blinck

stickersticker said the following:

An epic leak that would be! haha.

I accept you apology, and would like to let you know that your response has made my day. The internet is so full of fighting, it makes me feel good to make peace.

all the best!

Anyway, I just wanted to share this. It is just a small example of the way I wish things were on the internet. Will we progress in this direction? As we become less anonymous, as we develop real personal identities on the internet... Will we become the decent people I know we all are in real life?


I mean who knows, maybe Sevs is actually pleasant when you talk to him face to face? (ahhh, great, i end with an insult.... this peace making goal of mine will take some time to get good at, haha.)


p.s. yes, i acknowledge that my alias is "Peace Alliance" and that may somehow be relevant.