Headlines...

[Bravehart]

 These are actual headlines from various newspapers.  Read them, they're hilarious.  You may have to read some twice before you get the joke.

* * *

Include Your Children when Baking Cookies

Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash Expert Says

Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers

Experts Say School Bus Passengers Should Be Belted

Survivor of Siamese Twins Joins Parents

Iraqi Head Seeks Arms

Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over

Eye Drops Off Shelf

Teacher Strikes Idle Kids

Clinton Wins on Budget, But More Lies Ahead

Enraged Cow Injures Farmer With Ax

Plane Too Close to Ground, Crash Probe Told

Miners Refuse to Work after Death

Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant

Two Sisters Reunited After 18 Years at Checkout Counter

If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last a While

Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures

Deer Kill 17,000

Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges

Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead

Man Struck By Lightning Faces Battery Charge

New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group

Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft

Kids Make Nutritious Snacks

Chef Throws His Heart into Helping Feed Needy

Ban On Soliciting Dead in Trotwood

Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half

New Vaccine May Contain Rabies

Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors

Drunk Gets Nine Months in Violin Case

Prostitutes Appeal to Pope

British Left Waffles on Falkland Islands

Stolen Painting Found by Tree

War Dims Hope for Peace

Enfields Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide

[Ashyra Nightwing]

 *collapses*
LOL!!

[Bravehart]

 Only in America could someone state that "Kids make nutritious snacks." lol

[Trident]

 I like the "Clinton Wins on Budget, But More Lies Ahead"

SoOooOoOOoO true.

[Kenny Boy]

 Yes, that is sooooo true! *dies*

*is dead*

[fingo]

 I like "Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers"

[Kenny Boy]

 And the "Typhoon rips through cemetary, hundreds dead".

Alright this is great! And Funny!

String! :lol:  

[Raggon]

REVIVED!!!!!

But very funny.

[Dark Claws]

So funny.

[Raggon]

Do I sense sarcasm?

[Dark Claws]

War Dims hope for Peace. How is that not funny?

[Raggon]

It is funny.

[Dark Claws]

Yeah, that's what I was saying.